dennis;;callmebackdraft;;timemachine;;blast;;chamber;;attention;;detail;;activision Dennis "CallMeBackdraft" Aspers


By Dennis "CallMeBackdraft" Aspers on May 4, 2018

Graham!!!..... Yo, Graham; quit hogging the loo, you're already hired, there's no more need to clean your trousers. The job... euhm lets call it interview, is over. Now get outta there and get back to the barbeque to keep an eye on my T-Bone Steak! I mean, the damn thing isn't going to flip itself, you know !? And you, Jeremy; are you done with redecorating Sadhonker's Office? NO?!!! Jesus Christ how did you get past my rigorous hiring tactics

Always great. fun, those new hires. If only they came as prepared to the job as they did to the initial interview. oh well! Now, what day is it? WHAAAT?!?! It's the 12th ??? how did this happen. Helen!!! HELEN!!!!! Cameron where in gods name is Helen ? She quit ?!!! When ? Thursday a week ago? And why did nobody else warn me it was time to fire up the Big Red Timemachine again ???? Alright, that's it; all of you get in here NOW! Now, how do I say this kindly ? it is all well and good having you as our crew and I certainly hope you are all having a good time here, but I there is one minor thing I feel like I need to share with you all, before we continue this already too late time travel adventure... Are you all listening? Good, because. YOU'RE ALL FIRED!!!!!!!

Severance pay ? Whuahahhaha don't make me laugh; even the employees of Telltale games didn't get anything close to that and they actually did a good job, now is that clear ? Alright then, if you would just follow this hallway and take the last door on the right you will get. 'debriefed'. Well, get going. No need to let our dear readers wait any longer, O hey Ferry! What? How the hiring process went ? Well, pretty good actually; I hired a crew of 12 and now that I have tested our new hiring practices, I can tell you they are working fine! It also take great pride in the fact that the Firing process is also tested and working just fine. How I am able to share that info ? well you know those 12 new crewmembers I just told you about, yeah well they just took the last door on the right, if you know what I mean. Now, if you wouldn't mind; due to some circumstances I have to make haste because our readers have been waiting for a week for our next episode. Yeah, yeah I know, I'll be quick. There are some (about 500 or so) remaining resumes on your desk, so be a dear, would you.? Okay, BYEEEEEEEEE!

Well, now that that's all sorted out: HELLLOOOO dear readers. Sorry for the holdup but let's get going shall we ? Today we will travel back to the year 1996; a grand year if I say so myself. I was but a wee lad around the age of 8 when I got in touch with the game we will be looking at today. It is a game that was developed by Westwood Studios; a studio that, nowadays, sadly is no more but nonetheless a studio that left a big mark on the gaming industry by means of the Command & Conquer game series.

Command & Conquer, as a whole, is a game series that is split into 3 different sub series; The list consists of the Tiberian series, Red-Alert series and the Generals series, the series we will be looking at today is Red Alert, because this is the series that has always been closest to my heart as well as the hearts of many of my friends. The game we will look at is the first release in the series: the aptly named Command & Conquer: Red Alert.

Red Alert was the second game in the complete Command & Conquer series and served as somewhat of a prequel to the Futuristic Tiberian Dawn. It is set in an alternative history around the time of the second world war, however in the opening cut-scene we see a scientist ( which is later revealed as Albert Einstein ) travel back in time to 1924 and kill Adolf Hitler in order to prevent the Second world war from ever happening. Sadly, as these things tend to go (trust me, I have extensive experience in this field), this little trip through time doesn't have the desired effect. Nazi Germany is does not grow to be a military superpower, but now nothing stands in the way of the Soviet Union, which grows more and more powerful than ever before under the rule of Joseph Stalin. It is now up to us as a military commander for either the Allied forces or the Soviet regime the determine the outcome of the war that is now raging across the world.

As with all other games in the C&C series we wage war in a Real Time Strategy manner, building bases, training infantry and constructing vehicles of war, all in an effort to seize the victory for the army you are fighting for. And as always with this type of game, there's a precarious balance between building, attacking and defending that has to be kept at all times.

What made Red Alert and basically all other C&C special is that most of the cut-scenes are Live Action scenes made with real actors. This doesn't mean the game isn't filled with the necessary humor. It is clear that the devs knew what they where doing not only with the solid gameplay but the writers where also having a blast with both bad yet funny puns but still found a way to convey a believable story in which you truly want to conquer your enemies in order for your side to prevail.

Not only do the stories change, based on which Faction you choose; so do the armies. Each has their own strengths and weaknesses. Where the soviets focus on elemental damage like fire and electrical damage (possibly due to Nicola tesla's influence), the Allied army is more focused on High Tech systems, making them able to hide themselves from the mini map for instance or send out spies that can steal information from enemy bases. When you progress trough the story or play in a skirmish battle and have build all the necessary buildings, you will also get access to some sweet, sweet superweapons, ranging from a all-destroying Nuclear Missile for the soviets and the Chronoshift for the Allies, which allows you to teleport a large army directly into the enemies base.

Phew, that's another Trip done and dusted. Again, my friends, sorry about the delay, but the culprits have been terminated... euhm from their employment, I mean! Of course, we here at Big Red HQ would never actually terminate people. Could you imagine the lawsuits? You can rest assured that they will never be seen or heard of again. in the Big Red HQ, that is! Ah, where is Sadhonker, I want to know if he had better luck with hiring new people to work here. Plus, I have something very important to talk to him about. Something that concerns the future of this magnificent organization. For now: Fare thee well and see you next time when Sadhonker will take you on another adventure in time.

We here at Big Red Incorporated declare that we never have and will never harm any of our employees. This goes for all employees of Past, Present and Future. However, we do work with very dangerous materials and so all of our employees must sign both Non Disclosure Agreements and Risk Responsibility Agreements before entering the employment of Big Red Incorporated or any of its affiliates.

Westwood Studios & Virgin Interactive